TV Show Intro’s

They say smell is the closest sense to memory we have. To me I think my memories align with TV sitcom theme songs. I guess it was how I was raised as an only child but when certain shows from the 80’s come on I feel the need to get on the floor, face the screen less than a foot away, sit on my knees and drift into TV heaven where every episode had a moral lesson and every crisis lasted only 30 minutes. It is weird to think that Nell Carter’s voice can bring up memories of Fun Fruits.

These songs were really catchy too. I swear that if they came on the radio I would crank up the volume, singing every word without a care who was in the car. Even if I was carjacked the dude would have to shoot me before I changed Webster’s theme song.

Small Wonder wasn’t a huge show by any standard but to a third grader in the 80’s it was my world. God, I had such a crush on the girl who played the robot, V.I.C.K.I.. It’s kind of strange that I thought she was hot but in real life at school I truly thought girls were more or less bio-hazards. I guess they ranked about the same as Harriet. Oh goodness I hated her. I had fantasies that Vicki would punch the freckles right off her face. No such luck.

What would we do, baby? I never was too into Family Ties because, well, I never identified with the family. That song does bring up a little nausea, though. We were sitting in the family room watching Family Ties when I honked on my lap due to many many Samoa Girl Scout cookies consumed earlier in the day. To this day I can’t stand coconut, cookies with holes in the middle, the color purple, merit badges, or the Family Ties cowbell. Go figure?

One Day At A Time was on when I was still shitting myself and while I don’t have any real memories of this show I do remember my Mom playing this on the piano. Everyone confused her for Mackensie Phillips so she learned the theme song and sang it all the time. I guess she felt flattered by the comparison. Regardless I can taste Gerber peaches and smell the old ’71 Beetle when I hear this.

I still remember that this came on at 8 am on PBS. It’s not like I was down with reading or the fabulous book reporting the kids did or even the blind guy from StarTrek but this song means summertime. I have turned on this show many times in my bathing suit getting ready for a productive day of running through the sprinkler. Plus that synthesizer is just too cool. I still find myself imitating it even today. “beepee bop booo beeee pee bop pooo” I went a little too far, haven’t I?

Is there anyone in the world that doesn’t sing along with that? You can actually walk through the mall whistling “Charles In Charge’ and with in seconds some person with harmonize “….and our rights/nights.” Try it. I promise it will happen. If it doesn’t I will mail you a pink hat that says “Alamo” on it. I’m good for it.

This was mainly an after school show that involved me not studying Algebra and ultimately led me to a C. I never did thank Scott Baio for that. So, thanks Scott and after seeing your new show on VH1 I was right, you are a douchebag.

I loved this show when I was little. He was a pretty cute little kid and if George and Ma’am wanted to adopt a little bear cub that could talk this was as close to it as one could get. But I have a bone to pick with this show. My last name is Webster and most of the eighties and early nineties I was subjected to the same gay joke, “are you an adopted black midget?”. So, I owe the creators a thank you too. Thanks assholes.

Is there anything more one can say about ALF? Great show, good cast, funny puppet, and I was right at the appropriate age to really get into ALF. There was no shame in having Alf PJ’s or an Alf doll as a kid. In fact it was greeted with a tip of the hat and thumbs up among the peers. But recently I was watching an old episode and I had this uncomfortable sensation that I was in trouble. Then it hit me. Back when this show was popular I was a bit of a Hell raiser and about 8:10 on a Monday night, 1989, my teacher called to inform the folks that I was sent to the principals’ office for fighting. Can you believe a thirty year old guy’s heart jumps when the phone rings during Alf?

Nell Carter really wails, huh? I loved this show and I am not too proud to admit that if this was on a Karaoke list i would be all over it like Nell on a biscuit. OOOOOOH, I went there.

No real sensory driven memories about Gimme A Break but I just wanted to let everyone know I appreciated it. And I guess that will be all for now. I know there are a lot more like Growing Pains, Golden Girls, Empty Nest, C.H.I.P.S., Magnum PI, and….

Fuck me, I almost forgot Airwolf. This was the show I waited on all week. Even today when I am in a plane this song is on replay in my head. There is nothing cooler than this theme song and if anyone cares to argue you will be met with me plugging my ears, chanting”…I want to kill everyone, Satan is good, Satan is our pal..”

Ok, seriously. That is it.

17 thoughts on “TV Show Intro’s

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  1. Wow, that was a trip down Memory Lane! The only three staples from my childhood that you didn’t include were The Facts of Life (“You take the good, you take the bad…”), 3-2-1 Contact and Square One. Not sure if you had that last two when you were a kid (they were on PBS), but those were seriously my FAVORITE two shows! They came on at 4:30 and 5, and I would watch them while waiting for my parents to come home.
    Oh, and what about Fraggle Rock? The Muppet Show?! Thundercats? Oh oh! And HE MAN!!! “By the power of Grey Skull…” Wow, the nostalgia….. *sigh* Kids today are seriuosly missing out on some classic CLASSIC TV! Sponge Bob has nothin’ on Battle Cat if you ask me…

  2. Yeah Scott Baio is a douchbag on his show now huh? After he has sex with a woman it’s like he is repulsed by them.

    And what would WE do, baby? Without our love? That is what I am asking you Will right now! 😀

    old tv theme songs are great for your cell phone ringtone is a good site for that. I bookmarked it a few months ago.

    Especially that Airwolf one wow! didn’t watch that show but just watching that clip makes me want to put that on as a ringtone.

    I heard Neil Carter was not a nice person. She was bitchy.

    They still play reading rainbow, even the old episodes. Last year I saw part of one of the episodes in the series of episodes where he wears the different hats to go different places. My elementary school had tapes that were released with reading rainbow on them. I know at the end of class at the end of the day sometimes we would sit and watch them. We weren’t doing work AND we were watching reading rainbow! That was a slice of heaven.

    Oh yeah and Webster. I think there was an episode where he kept on wetting the bed. I could totally relate to that at the time. I know there was a different strokes episode where they talked about wetting the bed even though he was just faking it for the attention. Stupid move.

  3. “Contact…is the ANSWER…is the REASON…that everything happens…” Jeez, I still remember that song! Holy cow! Remember The Bloodhound Gang? So hilarious…

    “3….2….1….CONTACT!” Love it!

  4. I’ve already had two of these theme songs stuck in my head this afternoon. They’re all awesome.

    I do have to say the one song that gives me an actual flashback is the Dukes of Hazzard. It was like movie night at our house. Every Friday night, cherry Kool-Aid and popcorn (real popcorn) in the big yellow tupperware bowl. That giant one that everyone had back then.

  5. Oooh… I loved 3-2-1 Contact! I had forgotten all about it! And Square One too… I totally thought of Square One when I saw the Reading Rainbow intro.

    Okay, anything Muppets is a given and I do have to agree with the Facts of Life too.

    The Dukes of Hazzard was a big one for me too… I felt so grown up getting to stay up late on Friday nights to watch it!

  6. You may like to know that they’ve just released the Digitally Remastered official 2CD soundtrack for the Airwolf series, called ‘AIRWOLF THEMES’. It’s available via Apple iTunes Store, and others. It’s going down a storm with the show’s fans I hear. You can download the superb MP3 teasers from the official website –

  7. oh FUCK!
    Sometimes, I think the stuff I remember from my youth wasn’t actually real, and was my overactive imagination. Every time I see a helicopter I think of Airwolf… but never metioned it to anyone cause I wasn’t sure if I just imagined it.
    Gods, that show was wicked.
    Oh … and thanks to my pops for innundating me with grown-up entertainment and thinking it was over my head.
    He learned too late that I was smart little pistol…

  8. I was gonna write something new today, but after being schooled by this, I think I’ll just go to bed in shame….

    I don’t do the Reading Rainbow synth, but I do find myself doing the “dah doon don” transition sound they used between book reviews to help transition from one thing to a next at random times; it’s great when someone tells a stupid story that ends suddenly and no one knows what to say.

    What is it with our fascination with the sound effects of the 80’s?

  9. I grew up on 80’s sitcoms. Way, way, way too much tv. I’ll second (or third) the Facts of Life nomination. I also watched Punky Brewster, Too Close for Comfort, Mr. Belvedere, Riptide, The Fall Guy…and if we’re talking cartoons- Smurfs!

    Oh, and I have a box of Caramel DeLites (aka Samoas) in my desk drawer as I type.

Speak to me, Egor.

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