Beer, Bees and Vurps

It’s time for another wonderful beer review. This time we have breached the wire into the Holiday brews more commonly refered to as “Winter Ales” and to be honest with you, I’m not a huge fan. I am not a person for sweet stuff. Not even remotely. So when you add a ton of sugar and spices to man’s greatest invention, you can tell that I’ll turn my nose high and make my patented shit face. But a few do pass the test. The first couple did not. Actually in the 5th video I almost lose it. I’ll explain in a minute.

But first here is a beer that I hate.Proving that just because you wear an “It’s All Good” shirt doesn’t make everything “all good”. Oh, and my cat attacks a bee and I become a concerned parent. Such a sad life I lead at times.

You can actually skip ahead to the last 2 minutes of this and witness a true “boomerang” shot of beer. I don’t recall why, but when I drank the last sip it did not sit well at all and I had a mild episode. Of sorts. Thanks Mike for capturing the moment when I fought the need to yarf on the camera.

One small step for me, one giant leap backward for my manhood. Enjoy.

This blog will not turn into a beer vlog, I promise. I just need to post a few of these for a commitment I made. An over-commitment actually.

 

Cat On Back; Bee Died

So, I haven’t gotten much better. Just maintaining the same, really. But I am at home taking a little break from the everyday insanity and getting to know the cat a little better. So that is good. Did you know she wasn’t a fan of Neil Diamond? The nerve! But you know, it’s not like I can hate her for that. She’s too cute.

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Sorry for the sick face.

This is her new favorite place to sit. Unfortunately, it takes claws to get up there. And God help me if she spots something worth tearing off after. Like a bee this afternoon. It’s 41 outside and a bee showed up. Mother!

catonback
Ow! Ow! Ow!

This is a real action shot that I took at the precise moment the cat saw the bee. Notice my forward leaning and wincing posture as she dug her claws in my shoulder, readying to pounce? Yeah, I bleed.

deadbee

Long story short, the bee died and the cat tried to eat it. Pretty good story, huh? This is what Theraflu will do to you. Make you blog about absolutely nothing.

Really, the point of this post is to share that my first article was posted on Review The World.com.┬áIf you care to read it just click FizzGig and leave Brian some love on his blog. He’s going to be a papa!

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Oh To Be A Bee

I don’t know where you live but here, everything is yellow. The pollen is just unbearable and those who have allergies are suffering far worse than I can remember in previous years. I kind of feel bad for them because I see them have the same symptoms as a nasty cold or flu bug but they can’t stay home because it is a common excuse. And the fact it is non communicable so they have to just suffer in the cubicle. All day long all you can here is nose blowing and sneezing. If it were not April I would think we were on the verge of an epidemic.

This pollen also chaps my hide because I just bought a new car and wouldn’t you know it? I got a black car. Now I dive around in a dingy, yellowish-blackish car that screams, “I do the bare minimum in life and love it”. I had the luxury of owning a silver car before so the idea of weekly washes was never center stage in my mind. Now I have a monthly membership to a snotty car wash not because I can but because I have to. Oh the price of contemporary taste.

And the bees. There are tons of these guys that seem to have quadrupled in numbers in just a week. It’s not the yellow jackets or the honey bees so much but the big bumble bees. I have heard that they don’t sting but every time one is near it sounds as if you are about to but your face in a desk fan. There is nothing funnier than to see a full grown dude flip out, flail the arms and spring to a sprint when a bee is near. Especially if the people who are observing don’t see the bee at all.

If there is any truth to reincarnation I wouldn’t mind coming back as a bumble bee. The weather would have to be nice and I think scaring people would be a great hobby. I can’t in this life because, well, I am not very scary. That is unless I looked like a bee. Hrm……..

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