Karaoke, Beer and Bowling

I have to admit that even though I rip on the culture here in Idaho it has really increased my desire to write about some of the absurdities as if I was Crusoe keeping a journal. My phone is full of various pictures and notes that have to be seen to be believed. I actually sat next to an older couple the other night and the lady took out her teeth to smoke a cigarette. She told the bartender that she just soaked them before they came out and she wanted to keep them white. Fuck a duck! To be honest, they did look pretty white on a bevnap sitting on the bar. Had I been drinking more I probably would have put them in her ashtray when no one was looking because, well, I’m an asshole like that.

I know the picture above is blurry but this is where I was on Wednesday night. It was karaoke night at the bowling alley and more importantly it was “no smoking night” so I could give my jeans and shirts a break from having to practically burn them when I get home from the wreak of smoke. Notice that it is a David Allen Coe song? Yep, that little ditty was played no more than 30 times. And no one appreciated KISS’s “Strutter” either.

All in all there are some pretty good singers here in Idaho. HA! I can’t even type that with a straight face. The whole night sounded like a third grade trumpet recital. If I didn’t no better I would believe a gaggle of geese where circling over head confused on whether to fly south or mate on the cars in the parking lot. The real funny part is watching all the people support one another as each person butchered the song of their choice. I witnessed a few standing ovations and some “I just want to thank my Mama” speeches.

I really wished there was a Milo there.

By the way, what do you think he has in his pockets? My theory is Milo is packing dinner rolls from the “Singles Potluck/Karaoke Night”. It is plausible.

Anyway, did you know that zucchini grows larger here too? The bartender showed me her award winning zucchini and I have to tell you, i now feel a little inadequate.

Make sure you come back because this weekend I am doing my 2nd annual Fall Beer Review. It’s a great excuse to get loaded, carve something and possibly go to the emergency room. I’ll be back tomorrow. Me with 10 toes and 9 fingers.

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