“Spooky NC/GA” Episode 2: Moon River Brewing Co

I am no stranger to the restaurant, Moon River Brewing Company, located on E. Bay street down by the Savannah River. It’s a place that I will always visit when in town, even if it’s just to get an Apparition ale to-go. (You can get beer to-go and drink it on the street while…shopping.) But usually I stick around for a while to enjoy the company of the living. AND THE DEAD!

Was that too cheesy? That was too cheesy, wasn’t it? That was too cheesy.

This trip, however, was a little different from most because not only did I come for another Apparition ale but I was on a mission to include this place and others in the Halloween countdown series, “Spooky North Carolina”. I know, I know, I know… it’s a different state, but when it comes to material that’s close to a beach and great beer, we can all make an exception, don’t you think?

I was hoping to capture the feel of this place by shooting a video mixed with spooky background music and clips from Poltergeist. Not that I am lazy, but I didn’t plan on making anything out of this trip other than a few videos without commentary. Boy was I pleasantly surprised to get the invite and go where few people can, thanks to the sweet staff of the Moon River.

It’s a spooky place whether you believe the stories or not. Just about every person who works there has had an experience so just in numbers, it’s really hard to argue that this is only a rickety old building. There are documented duels, murder, madness, plague and the hundreds who died on this property, so it’s a wacky place.

In this episode, we start in the basement and end up in the attic, which is way more than I expected to get and am very grateful to the staff for the fun addition. There are some scenes from the show Ghost Adventures that airs on the Travel Channel because they did one Hell of a job capturing the feel of the darker areas. It helps guide you to where we were and why.

I also need to give thanks to the awesome girl who held the camera for me. It must have been a weird proposition but that’s why I am in sales. A.B.C.!

September 9, 2013 2

I Bought Death. He Was A Bargain.

Last night I went on a Halloween hunt for anything that the stores are willing to put out for this, the first week of September, 2013AD. It is hard to have much luck here in Winston-Salem because it seems anything new first appears in larger cities. I have been eying the loot my buddies like Molly and Cliff (Holidaze) with envy. But yesterday I hit gold. Fifty dollar gold but still gold, none the less. I bought Death.

I was shopping at CVS earlier in the day for something. I can’t, for the life of me, remember what it was because when I strolled down a meek Halloween display I saw this huge box, boasting it’s a $90 value for only $49.99. A six-foot Grim Reaper that was a bargain too?!?! How can one not? But I was still in a suit and leaving out of a CVS during the work day carrying a $50 grim reaper was not in the cards. So I left to change and come back. I’m weird about such things.

I bought the big bastard and proudly marched it out of the CVS while passing snickering customers and clerks. I don’t care. Such joy is oblivious to “normals”. I had a six-foot pillar of death and I found him at a drug store. Everything is right about that and no one can take that from us.

When I got him home I couldn’t take the time to take the dogs out because I was too excited to construct this guy. They would have to hold it a little while. But when I opened the box and saw this mess of bones, pipes and wires, I got their leashes out. This would be a process.

What’s the movie where a ball of mess comes crashing through a window and it slowly morphs to a terrific monster? Is it Bram Stoker’s Dracula? I don’t think it is but it’s close. Regardless, this is what this ball of mess on the office bed looked like. (Damn that’s a dumb filler)

EDIT: It was the original Salem’s Lot!

By the time I had this all straightened out I was more confused than when I had begun. You might ask, “Will/Bill, where are the directions?” And I would answer, “Rump roast”.

I don’t read directions.

But I will say, this was a bit confusing to get to the skull and see a giant spring sticking out the back. I almost was about to drill a whole in the wall and have a bouncing skull for my “wall of dread” that makes so many guests uncomfortable, but we are so close, why deviate from the goal now?

The body was just a bunch of tubes with a large electronic shoulder/torso that is constantly twisted in a death shroud. I hate fabric and trying to untangle it. That’s why I don’t sail. But with patience and perseverance, it started to take shape.

I figured out that the spring goes directly into the shoulder-hole, giving the head a constant bounce or “bobble-head” look like the box advertised. It didn’t seem like it would work but now that the head is one, this creature of death is most agreeable. He even likes my shirt no matter how I posed the question. Always a yes-man, I guess.

Finally! Oh wow, that is great. I now know how the father in The Christmas Story felt when looking at his major award for mind power. I just want to sit and Instagram him holding various items and signs like the shaming photos of dogs. “I ate a pillow and pooped in the hallway.” That could not do anything except gain friendship around the world.

So that is how I put him together but what else does Grim do? He moves and talks! I found this out while trying to find the “on” switch and simultaneously connecting the skull wires. It was a surprise which caused me to somehow miracle myself into the den. He’s really loud.

I’m just going to have to show you a video. Words can fail when describing such things.

He says quite a bit more when you set him to “sound activated” but when you press his hand, it’s only the one line. That’s okay with me. I love him no matter what he says.

Wow, when viewing this little video I found my missing Powerade!

September 5, 2013 6

Spooky North Carolina: The Devil’s Tramping Ground

Welcome to my first web series, “Spooky North Carolina”, for the Halloween Countdown here at VeggieMacabre. This has been an ongoing project that has tried and failed for a couple of years but not this time. I have finally managed to go to enough places, include enough people and get the proper equipment to make this a success that I hope can continue for Halloween seasons to come.

The first episode we go to the infamous, Devil’s Tramping Ground, located in Chathum County, NC. Just about everyone around this state knows about the spot where the Devil himself is said to appear and walk the Earth. It is a perfect circle about 30 feet in diameter with absolutely no vegetation within the circumference.

Well, most would ask, what is the big deal? There are ton’s of lawns that have that problem.

True but it is a pretty strange to have a spot that is surrounded by plenty of vegetation right up to a perfect circle. Many believe it’s a true vortex rather than the Devil’s thinking spot which is very odd and has been documented for hundreds of years, baffling scientists and attracting plenty who worship the occult.

Over all, it’s a fun urban legend whether you believe or not.

Enjoy!

September 4, 2013 3

I Love The Smell Of Fall In The Morning

It’s a tough time of the season when you want all of the Halloween stuff out right now but most retailers (looking at you Target) are more concerned with backpacks and *enter boy band here* covered Trapperkeepers. It’s a tease. We are at the 10:20am mark before the menu switches and everyone is fully committed, so you have to kinda take what you get until then. That’s why this morning I am writing about smells of the demonic. Or maybe just Fall.

Searching Target in vain for anything spooky I settled on their mild nod to the season in the Fall scent aisle. They have a few purely Fall titled sprays between Glade and good ol’ Febreze. If you are not into spays because you think the Ozone still has a sunroof, don’t worry your hippy hair, they make them all in both candles and plug-ins. I picked up the sprays because I need a limited example of each. I can’t smell up each room in my house for this review.

Actually, that would have been pretty cool. Double Shits!

First on the list we have “Salted Caramel” from Glade, an SC Johnson product. At first glance I thought this to be both amazing and totally Halloween. At first smell, however, I thought this was more “Midnight Cowboy” from CVS. It’s a heavy scent that really doesn’t leave one area. By that I mean there is no permeation but a solid mass that waits for unsuspecting people to walk through it, sticking to their face like a spider web or swarm of mosquitos. You won’t get it out of the back of your throat no matter how many pumpkin beers you gargle with.

The description states it has a “…pop of salty and sweet caramel fragrance.” which is odd. I have smelled sweet things but I can’t recall an account of smelling salty things. Maybe the ocean. I don’t know. C-.

Switching from candy to leaves, Febrese Air Effects has a their “Falling Leaves” limited edition spray. I was immediately attracted to this for some reason. I think it is just specific memories of cool mornings walking home from a Friday night bash, smelling the wet leaves and cursing the 6am Saturday runners. It’s a distant memory but still an effective one.

But this can does not capture that olfactory sense at all. I think they captured Great Aunt Ann rather than anything Fall. You know the smell; make-up and sixty year old perfume? Yeah, you do. This is another air spray that is better suited to kill any offensive oder by masking it with a different but equally offensive oder. It smells and hangs heavy in the air like an invisible bag of piss, waiting for an unsuspecting passer-by who will most likely have their mouth open. D.

Here is another SC Johnson product from Glade and this is interesting. “Hayride”? I never knew a Hayride was an attractive smell. If memory serves me right it’s a mix of allergic attack and either horse poop or tractor exhaust depending on which mode of pull the farm chooses. It’s like their “Salted Caramel” idea, I just hope it’s not executed the same.

I like it! It’s really interesting and it does remind me of a Fall scene. It’s not quiet Hayride but it smells a lot like the first day of school. I can’t explain it but taking a huff off this can I am walking into Mt. Bethel Elementary with a backpack larger than my torso and velcro shoes. It’s really incredible! I love it and this is going in the den rather than the last two who are banished to the bathrooms. A-. (The minus is only because it’s not Hayride. That might be a good thing.)

Finally we come to another Glade spray and while this one isn’t original what so ever, I do believe my saturated nose will enjoy this. “Orchard Apple Cinnamon” can not not smell amazing. It just can’t!

Oh wow. Wow that smells a lot like one of those 365 days a year Christmas shops. When I take a whiff from this I am surrounded by thirty fake and tacky Christmas trees with tacky decor while fat tourists wearing fanny packs slowly meander through the narrow aisles eating soft serve out of a cup. THIS IS NOT HALLOWEEN! WAIT YOUR TURN SPRAY! C. (Will be an A when November first arrives.)

So there you have it. None of these scream Halloween and only one really has something to be proud of. Go to Target and spray these around to see..er…smell for yourself. I am fairly certain “Hayride” will be in your cart. The other three can be used to kill spiders.

Sorry the countdown hasn’t been totally wheels up since my job is not sympathetic to my demon worshiping self but hang on, shit’s about to get real.

OH! And guess who started their Halloween Countdown? Matt from Dinosaur Dracula started his chainsaw and it’s amazing. Please go there now. NOW! (Click the header)

August 31, 2013 0

The Banshee Flash Fun

I love spooky stories and I especially love the spooky stories that have been told for hundreds of years. It’s like a provocative way to pass superstitions and family stories for generations to enjoy around a fire or scare their kids as they are tucked in for the night. Folklore and legend make for wonderful lessons and childhood memories.

A good example would be when I was probably seven or eight my Great Aunt Margret was tucking me in bed for the night around Christmas time. She was straight off the boat from Ireland just a few years before I was born and I always remember her shrill tone and pure Irish wit as she chastised us for watching TV or late for dinner. It wasn’t until much later after her death did I learn she would smile when she was really angry. My entire childhood I believed she was only kidding when she yelled, confused by her facial expressions.

I’ll never forget the story that she told me while tucking me in, warning that I needed to be asleep before the Banshee arrived and that every night she could pop in to see if all children were asleep. If they weren’t she would let out a horrible scream and steal their soul. If that story wasn’t terrifying enough, she imitated a Banshee-like scream at the top of her lungs, raising her hands in grabbing motions and that terrible, terrible look on her face as she finished to a growl still sticks with me today.

That’s an excuse to piss the bed if ever there was one. Oh, and I forgot to mention, Great Aunt Margret didn’t have any kids.

To this day the legend of the Banshee is one of my favorites like the Headless Horseman or Dracula. The thought of a horrible female ghost coming in a house at night to collect souls really had me quaking under the sheets as a kid but now that I am an adult, it’s a fun story. That’s why this amazing flash animation of The Banshee by Ed Bain at the site, Darkartsmedia.com, is so great and unbelievably well done.

This short animation has such an eerie feel to it. You listen to the ghostly winds and the lack of music adds to the dreary and melancholy effect as a woman tells her story of the Banshee coming to reap the soul of her grandmother.

The story has a bit of everything that makes the hairs stand on the back of the neck from the graves to the skeletons creeping behind the Banshee. The narrator tells of farm hands who report seeing a young girl walking alone in the woods and when they call she disappears. That is pretty creepy, I will admit.

It ends with the Banshee screaming out at night from the roof of the house of the narrator as she took her Grandmother’s soul. The moon turns blood-red and skeletons creep up the yard towards the house.

She did, however, fail to include the part when she shit her pants. I guess that would detract from the story but I wouldn’t lay blame for something I would absolutely do.

This is a cool little piece of the internet that I like to visit when the days get a little shorter and the air is crisp. Please take a gander and turn the speakers up high. Ed suggests visiting between the hours of 3am and 4am.

It requires Adobe Flash so unfortunately iPads and iPhones aren’t able to play this but everything else should be A-OKAY. Truly a love of mine.

THE BANSHEE

August 26, 2013 2

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