Category: Random

W.B. Yeats Don’t Know Idaho

    • O you not hear me calling, white deer with no horns?
      I have been changed to a hound with one red ear;
      I have been in the Path of Stones and the Wood of Thorns,
      For somebody hid hatred and hope and desire and fear
      Under my feet that they follow you night and day.
      A man with a hazel wand came without sound;
      He changed me suddenly; I was looking another way;
      And now my calling is but the calling of a hound;
      And Time and Birth and Change are hurrying by.
      I would that the Boar without bristles had come from the West
      And had rooted the sun and moon and stars out of the sky
      And lay in the darkness, grunting, and turning to his rest.

by: William Butler Yeats (1865-1939) He Mourns for the Change that has Come Upon Him…

This poem has always been near and dear to my heart and every change of direction I make in life, this piece of literary art takes center stage in my mind. It is melancholy but like most of Yeats’ work, it wouldn’t be same if it were without some sadness. I guess that is a direct symbol of change. There has to be some mourning of the past to take on and accept the future. I miss the comforts of old, the people and my family. The sun has set on that day and the cold, lonely darkness of night is here but I can faintly see the purplish hue of dawn. A new day; my future. And it will be bright and warm with endless possibilities.

But then I was driving to campus and I passed this:

Hey Yeats! Got any poems about Idaho? I didn’t think so. Dick.

Edit: One more thing. There are somethings that are too good not to be shared. Please read. I almost had an “episode” in the library.

http://socialpariah.wordpress.com/2008/09/04/whirling-whip-like/

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Back from The Mountain

I know, I know…I have been a shitty poster. Actually I have an excuse and a good one at that. You see, I live on a mountain now. No really, I live on a mountain and the closest neighbor I have is over two miles away. It may take a week to get the Internet hooked up so I have to drive to the valley to use the great wide world of the web. But I don’t mind it. For the past two weeks my life has been anything but normal and I’ll fill you in on some very random shots and even more elusive explanations that will have you piecing together your own conclusions. Let’s begin shall we?

This has now become normal to me. No longer will two fifty year olds wearing purple silk pants and fishnet stockings on a motorcycle be blog worthy material. I have become completely desensitized. I don’t even know if a mime playing the bagpipes on a segway will cause me to pause anymore. Regardless I did take the picture and did so very cautiously. I make it a point in life to never get my ass kicked by a dude in purple pants.

Living in hotel rooms for weeks on end is not only very expensive but it completely sucks. If I had to audit my sleeping time in life I would bet that a year and a half has been spent in a Holiday Inn Express. So, when I came out here I made it a point to find a spot to rent as soon as possible and left it in the hands of Vista Management Co. I sent them a background form and $50 so they could process me in and find a one bedroom place as quickly as possible. Well, this is what they had. A Bavarian crack house.

You can’t quiet tell from this picture but the windows had blankets over them for makeshift drapes, people were looking out the windows checking me out as if I were a poorly undercover agent for the DEA and I swear I heard Cheech and Chong singing “Beeners” from inside one of the rooms. Oh, and built onto this complex was a tattoo and piercing parlor called The Blue Rose.

Well, to grossly understate this, I was a little disappointed in Vista, myself and Idaho. I went back to the management office and the moron lady asked what I thought as she smirked. I said in a very nice tone that if it could suck any harder it would turn inside out. I dropped the keys on her counter and walked out feeling great that I blew $50 and an hour out of my day. I think I may ask Allison’s husband Matt if he could write a nasty letter to them.

But every time it seems that life leads you down a path to no where, a random tether ball hits you in the back of the head, forcing you to look in a new direction. (Jesus Mary and Carpenter that made no sense.) What I mean is that I found some luck and was able to stay with very nice people until I found a place worthy of my snotty taste. And to my surprise they didn’t chop me up and serve me in chili. It was a win win. They even had two cute dogs,

The one on top is Teddy and below is Missy. Both are very sweet but as far as cuteness goes I have to lean towards Missy. And that is only because of her under-bite. Actually now that I think about it, Missy looks kind of like Dee Wallace in the movie The Howling. It was when she turned into a Shitzu at the end. See it?

Well, not before too long I found a place that met my needs and was reasonable in price. The only catch is that it is secluded. And what I mean by secluded is that it is up a mountain and the nearest neighbor is over two miles away. I think by mid November when the snow starts to fall these posts my start sounding like Jack Torrence and be in various shapes and stanzas. But for now it is warm and I love it. Check out the kitchen!

And here is the view from the back window:

Until I get my stuff put together that is all I can show for now. It’s out there but I think this will work. Funny thing is the city-boy in me really comes out because the other night I came home to find 5 wild turkeys walking around and the first thought that popped in my head was “I wonder if they bite”. Luckily a dear friend of mine assured me that they don’t. But I still have my eyes open.

Internet will be up soon and I’ll stop having to come down to the “valley” every time I need to post something. But for now I am hanging out next to a poster of Brandy Norwood in a major University library. She is encouraging literacy as she sports a copy of The Cat In The Hat. That’s the book I would have chosen too.

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Ida-NOOOOOOO!

I do apologize for the week plus hiatus. Getting situated and orientated really has left me no time to update. But I can promise you I have much to tell. So be a dear and put the tea kettle on; I have stories. Actually those will have to wait a day. For now, I want to share some observations I have about Idaho.

  1. There are far more bars than churches. There was even a bar next to the exit of my street that had a place out front where people can tie up their horse. Let me say that again. They have designated horse parking.
  2. Just because it says that the restaurant is Chinese doesn’t mean that the people working there are. My waitress from last night was Claire and she lived in Idaho her whole life. Steven was her husband. He was the cook.
  3. Every Wednesday night is “No Smoking Night” at the local bowling alley. Any other night, smoke ’em if you got ’em!
  4. Past Coeur d Alene, the driving rules turn to “what is deemed acceptable” which means, there isn’t very much that is enforced. I suppose what Idahoans deem acceptable is to turn around in the seat, bend over and put their face on the backseat and drive with their feet. Because that is the only way I can rationalize some of the maneuvers I have witnessed on 95.
  5. I haven’t seen a minority in weeks and I am beginning to freak out.
  6. Common health notions like smoking is bad for your health, chewing tobacco causes cancer, eating more than 15 bean and cheese burritos a day can increase risk of heart disease and deodorant hasn’t quite made it here yet.
  7. The moustache hasn’t died here. It’s alive and well.
  8. Neither has the mullet.
  9. Being from Georgia I am always shocked when I am talking with a “country” looking fellow and he has no southern accent. It’s the weirdest thing.
  10. I often sit next to some guy who has dirty, grimy hands but he took the time to put on enough cologne for the two of us. And by “enough for the two of us” I mean I smelled like “Midnight Cowboy” from Walmart for the rest of the night.

I love it here. I was starting to run dry of material in Atlanta and now the cup runith over. Or something like that. Fitnessmacabre will be rocking, I pray, by Friday. It’s all up to Northface as to the sponsor regulations. Not my fault I swear! Blame Sarah. She can take the heat. J/K Sarah. Keep a look out because Cristunity has a great article when it launches.

18

The Great Trek: The Last Day

Idaho: Where the elevation exceeds the population. -unknown

After a night of “moseying” I got up early and did the same thing I did the previous few mornings and made my way back to I-90. Even though Billings was pretty I was ready to get to Coeur d’ Alene. I guess it really started to hit me somewhere between Boseman and Bute that I had only seen a few pictures of the city that would soon be my home. There was this choking sensation in my throat like a sickly kid in school ingesting  peanuts. The enormity of this spontaneous move started to sink in because in 7 hours I would be in a city were I knew no one, had no place to live and school and work didn’t begin for another week. But, that’s how I do things. I do them as risky as possible.

Well, after an hour of making whimpering and wheezing sounds I calmed down and tried to take in some of the great state of Montana which, not surprisingly, was unbelievable. Then came the rain. But not before I stopped for gas and saw Burger Time! I have heard of these but never have I laid eyes on one. And now I have. Sorry about the bug guts.

I didn’t take too many more photos because the last leg of the journey really became hairy between the rain, mountain passes, construction and the 75 mph speed limit that didn’t let up at all. I was trying not to ‘fuck the dog’ with only a few short hours left in the trip. Can you imagine driving 2300 miles and wrecking with only 10 miles to go while trying to take a picture of trees? Almost happened.

Well, I battled the harsh weather over the mountain range and at the peak of the mountains I crossed over to the last state of the leg, Idaho. I was in the upper part of the great mistake, er, state and the next stop was the city of Coeur d’ Alene. Like a bomber pilot on his/her last mission, all I wanted to do was park and say that I made it with no incidences. And in 45 minutes I was able to do just that.

After a few moments of breathtaking beauty, as seen above, I took the City Center exit and made my way towards the visitors center so I could get a list of hotels and possibly a tip on where to get a couple of beers. That’s always of importance to me. I’m Just being honest. So I pulled in to the parking lot, stretched and walked up to the steps of the visitor center.

I don’t know why, but I was a little disappointed I didn’t have a welcoming committee awaiting my arrival. I imagined the mayor, Miss Idaho, a rodeo clown and a member of the local Native American tribe, all standing there with a basket of coffees, fruit and a ‘Welcome To Idaho’ t-shirt. Nope, it was just me and a dirty car.

So, the lady at the help desk did just that; she helped me. I found a Comfort Inn to shower and unpack a little and then I walked around the city center keeping an eye out for any welcoming places to drink a couple of cold ones. It was pretty chilly out too. Forgot to mention that I was wearing a sweater.

Foof! I look spent and I think that is with good reason. I found this really cosmopolitan bar called “The Beacon” that was full people in their late 20’s early 30’s. I didn’t stick out too much but I felt alone. Jim Morrison really hit it on the head when he sang “..people are strange, when you’re a stranger. Face’s look ugly, when you’re alone..” I suppose the bartender felt a little bad for me because my tab was cut in half and she gave me free shots. Who said pathetic looks don’t go far? Anyway, I made my way back to the room, grateful that the trip across the country was over, turned on the TV and drifted off to the theme song from Cheers. I want to go where everybody knows my name…

So, that wraps up the trip but I have been here for a few days and there is so much more to tell. I’ll keep these posts rolling. But for now I will leave you with a little known fact about Idaho. Above every urinal there is a head butt dent. I never knew that! And….now you know.

22

The Great Trek: Day 3

This is crazy! This is crazy! This is crazy! – Clark Griswald

It’s funny when you drive across country where your mind tends to go. I think I changed my voting preference at least 10 times based on whatever XM radio talk show I was listening to. I managed to sing “Stairway To Heaven” in Pig-Latin and made up my own sociology project by looking at passing drivers and pointing straight at them. Only one pointed back. What else am I suppose to do when driving across North Dakota? This is all I saw for 6 hours:

The good thing is that the speed limit increased to 75 mph so I pushed it to 85. And so did everyone else. With a cross wind of at least 35 mph I had my left foot depressed on the floorboard as if I was applying left rudder. You can’t take the pilot out of the plane, I suppose. That was enough to make me pay attention so I didn’t fall asleep and hear the familiar “bump bump bump rrrrrrrrrrr” sound as I drive off the highway.

And through the plains came the mountains. This is on the west side on North Dakota and I became a little more perked up as it was clear I had arrived at the beginning of the scenic route. It’s amazing how these hills and mountains just start. That sounds dumb because, well, how else should they? I guess after 2 and a half days of driving I can be impressed by anything. Especially the fifty foot cow you see above.

These are the Bad Lands and Holy Schmit they were awesome. As a city boy I am in awe how anyone could have lived here. The theme song to Dances With Wolves was constantly in my head as I walked around the park, looking at the wild horses way up on the top of these peaks and wondered, “aren’t they hot?”. It was a really inspiring break from the road. Right up until I saw this:

Back in the car!

Well, I drove straight on to Billings, Montana were I found a cozy spot at a Holiday Inn Express. And I needed a beer, stat. So I moseyed (I can do that since I was in Montana) over to the bar next door. And no shit, that’s were there were real cowboys. There is nothing better than sitting in between a bunch of the toughest dudes in America in designer shoes, Banana Republic jeans, The Clash t-shirt and order a Michalob Ultra. Especially when the Loretta Lynne looking bartender said “we got Bub and Budlight, sweet thing”. I got a Bud. Maybe I overplayed my hand on that one.

This story had a happy ending, though. The beers were only $2.25. Then I moseyed on back to my room.

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