I know it sounds lame or lazy to come back over and over again with the excuse of why there hasn’t been much in the way of material for VeggieMacabre lately but no matter what, its true. Work has taken a turn to the extreme with my new position and it’s easy to control your own future but when you take on other people’s future, things get serious quickly. Good leaders inspire, not fire. Lately I have been feeling pretty low for failing others when they have not achieved the minimum requirements for employment in my office. They have failed because I have failed them. That is what my years in the military has taught me. Unfortunately, people above me have never learned those lessons or have been in situations to acquire that skill so I work with what is given to me.
That said, I have really missed what brought me so much joy for so many years. I am not the greatest writer in the world or the most patient of a proof reader, but over these years I have connect, met and become great friends with people through this very odd blog. I have tried different ideas and even platforms but at the end of the day I still comeback to the basics. It’s what works and it is a love.
In order to make anything a priority, you have to invest. Whether that is time or money, the investment makes the hobby as rewarding as it is fun. So I have done it. I have a separate studio now for everything in the works. Not only that but I have reached out and have invited others to become part of the show. These buddies are both local friends to people hundreds of miles away. All are an a key player in something that will be entertaining for all.
I know what you are thinking, “yeah Will/Bill, we’ve heard this before but then you disappear and then a random post about a shitty taco pops up and then nothing for a month.”
You’re right, I have been threatening long enough. But I am now ready to leap into the unknown with a fully and heavily invested commitment. I hope you like. Now watch this teaser for my long time project, “The What The Hell Show”. I am so excited and man, this will be fun!
Holy cats, I am back! Can you believe it? I can’t. Anyway, a few months back I had the crew over for a fun weekend full of horror movies, beers and food challenges. It is a rare thing to have a group of people who all nerd-out over the same things. You know Ben, Brian and Dave (DJ D). They have been on here before.
On this episode of “what were we thinking”, Ben introduced us to Epic Bars; the bars made of grass-fed, organic, paleo friendly, gluten-free beef and turkey. Let’s just say we had a time trying these bars. A trying time.
The beef Epic bar was the first taste test and wait until you hear our opinions. Watch and learn!
Next we try the Turkey Epic bar. While not quite as offensive as the beef, it still brought fear and panic. It’s a wonder how as you chew these bars, they become dryer leading to a dissolving dust. This one also led to the hashtag, “Gone Full Franklin”.
Watch and be entertained by our contorted faces and repeated thoughts of poop.
So there you have it. If you want to be paleo/gluten-free/organic/grass-fed/low glycemic/humane then prepare to eat bars that have already been digested. But take my advice, just eat a steak.
Hoooowdy Hooo! Welcome back to the HolidayHellShow and today I am unboxing Dinosaur Dracula’s Holiday Fun Pack. What is a Dinosaur Dracula Fun Pack, you ask? Well I will ask, where the hell have you been?
I kid because I love.
The Fun Packs are amazing boxes full of nostalgic delight that Matt puts together and mails to you every month. Lately they have had certain holiday themes because we are in the twilight of the four months which shines over at Dino Drac but it is an ongoing subscription for only $25 a month. Very impressive stuff, too. I don’t know how he does it but as I speak I am looking at an Alien Xenomorph watch and Gremlin flip books from the eighties and lord knows how he found these gems.
Each box also comes from a personalized note from Matt with detailed instructions on how to maximize the box to its fullest potential of the goodies. This was something I had to video. I know there have been much better ones made but for the Hell Show, it had to be included. Watch the madness and if you want to (which you should) pop over to his site and subscribe to get one of your very own!
It is Sunday Funday here over at VeggieMacabre HQ and we are smack in the middle of the HolidayHellShow. Today, I am dipping into the realm that Dinosaur Dracula does so well. I have been on the couch with Christmas movies on the TV, homemade chicken soup cooking in the crockpot, a glass of merlot by my side and the YouTube Time Machine whisking me away to the commercials that filled the time between Merry Christmas Charlie Brown. It is magical. Let’s take a look and dissect these toy ads we grew up with and rip on the kids who were in these.
I was only marginally into He-Man growing up. I loved the idea and Castle Grey Skull was cool but at the end of the day, I just couldn’t get down with characters that look like a well fibrous poop. The accessories, however, were pretty damn amazing. Take Skeletor’s Dragon Water Blaster pack, for an example. You had the ability to soak your friends’ toys and be the little dick of the neighborhood.
Let us look at this advertisement. It is hilarious to look back and see these kids imitate their He-Man characters in the gruffest voice a nine-year old could make. I think it was just in the 1980’s that toy advertisers propped up kids to overact their group playtime. I never remember doing any of this! And look at the little fool who takes it to a new level and freezes himself for the duration of the commercial. He is only over to play because either these are all his toys or his mom is friend’s with one of their mothers. No one likes him.
But the one that stood out the most was the little nut-weed who had the Dragon Blaster Skeletor. Just look at him cackle with delight forcing his playmates to freeze. I know this kid. He’s the neighborhood dick who bullied you into throwing oranges at cars or rings door bells and running. He had an older brother who would beat the hell out of him so shit would roll downhill if you ever came over to his house. He is Reed and he was the one who threw the Cadberry Cream Egg through the kitchen window, not me Dad. “I SAID FREEZE!..OR I’M NOT PLAYING!”
The Sly Snootles and the Max Rebo play set was such a weird toy to get. I guess if you had the entire Jabba Palace play set it wouldn’t be complete without musical entertainment but to just have this set, I don’t know. I guess you could pretend they are a Nirvana galactic cover band touring for your other toys. It’s a stretch but I guess it works.
At least these kids got to kill Sly Snootles.
Is it just me or is Droopy McCool the shittiest of all Star Wars characters? He looks like a waterlogged pig who was put in jorts and pushed down a well.
I’ve covered this one before and every Christmas I tend to bring it up again. It’s getting to be a tradition. I never got the USS FLAGG and I’m still bitter about it. Looking back I understand because it was hard to sell the folks why I needed a toy bigger than the dinning room table. But I didn’t care and I blame this commercial.
GI Joes commercials always superimposed kids into the battle to ride in the vehicles and immerse themselves into the world and fight against COBRA. It worked and watching three kids run up and down the flight deck of the USS FLAGG made me want it worse than my dog wanting his hump blanket.
I have faith the new line of GI Joe will release the FLAGG and this time, it will be mine. I want to eat sushi off the deck of it in my living room and watch Nightmare On Elm Street 3. You have to have goals in life otherwise you’ll never have anything!
Oh hell, I had a lot of these. I don’t know if it was all at once or over the course of many Christmases but even today, if you go down in the parent’s basement, I bet in under ten minutes you will find a ROTJ Speeder Bike part. They blew apart with a little button in the back and in my house, that means they never stayed assembled.
While researching for this nonsensical post, I learned the Kenner Star Wars theme song never changed for any toy over the course of the trilogy. It wasn’t anything Lucas but it was something that has been in my head since three this afternoon. And will probably be there until three o’clock in the afternoon of December 14th 2027.
I love watching these kids race their speeders around the yard showing off the speed breaks and blow-apart action of the Speeder Bikes. This was a little before my time judging by their hairstyles. They seemed to have the Rocky Balboa and Apollo Creed cuts.
Alright, for a guy who remembers not being the biggest He-Man fan, I have to add another vintage commercial. Boy did I like this and it solidifies why I am such a big fan of monster movies and the dark side. The He-Man Snake Mountain play set looked evil it completely lived up to expectation. Even including a Hensen inspired bird face that would move its beak as you spoke through the echoing (reverb) microphone. Pure gold.
Today, the true prize is watching these kids play with it and imitate Skeleton in a voice that makes you question if they even watched the cartoon. And the ginger kid rocking the mic made my millennium. Look at his contorted face! I hope he grew up to be the scary warning voice for animatronics horror rides on the boardwalk.
Well, that concludes my little skip through time to revisit some of the great toys we grew up. It’s nice to relive some of the best times of our childhood while watching the advertisements and the silly kids who played with their toys all wrong.
Hey-O! Just me here and I have a present for you. This past summer I had a business/personal trip to the great states of Massachusetts, New Hampshire and Rode Island and while I met numerous wonderful people the highlight of the trip was the chance to hangout with the great J.W. Ocker. Who says blogging about jelly beans and ghosts will get you nowhere?
So, while I was in Boston to meet up with the parental units for Mom’s birthday, he met me at the hotel for beers before we set out on an amazing tour of the great historic Boston. It was a real treat to have one of the premier experts on not just Edgar Allan Poe but quite a bit of the darker places in Boston. We even were called out by a fan of J.W. Ocker at Cheers. No shit, this awesome dude ran into him at the bar and tagged along with us as we hit the pubs. It was surreal.
So, why am I writing about this some six months later, you ask? Well, J.W. Ocker sent me a few copies of his books which are autographed and instead of me keeping them for my own collection, I have decided to give them to you for Christmas. I have read them all and have my own copies.
How do you get them? Easy! Just follow me on Facebook and message me! Also you will need to follow O.T.I.S. on Twitter too. It’s a win win win! Trust me, you want to read these three each about two times. More if you have time.
So, no cost to you and I will send them out mega fast shipping to anywhere in the US. If you are reading this from the former USSR, message me and I will see what I can do. There is still love for you too.
So one more time, follow me on the Facebook page right to the top right corner of this site and follow J.W. on Twitter and then message me. I only have a limited amount so let me know!
Get ready for stupid holiday videos. They are in the editing room as we speak. Soon.
Casserole of Disaster 